I have a confession to make. I am struggling mightily with obedience. If you look back in my blog, you'll see that I lost almost 100 pounds by focusing on obedience instead of dieting. It was an awesome, life-changing time. But for the last four months, I have struggled. And I have to say it out loud...I've gained back over 10 pounds since July! I've been great at exercising but I have not been able to get my eating squared away again.
It's not because God has abandoned me in this journey. Oh no. He has been speaking to me loud and clear. But I have been purposely and willfully ignoring him. I say every day that this is the day that I am going to get it right. And then my morning gets stressful. My sweet tooth kicks in. There is work on my desk that I want to avoid. So off to the candy jar I go. Again.
And speaking of work, that's another place that where I'm struggling. I have been given a tremendous opportunity to lead a large team on a challenging, interesting project. But I have trouble staying motivated and tend to waste a lot of time. Then I rush to make a deadline, putting out work that is not the best it could be.
So what's the deal? Why can't I be obedient to what I know I am supposed to do?? I found a key in Greater by Steven Furtick this week.
At the end of Chapter 2, he said, "...obedience to God's voice is the only definitive path to greater." He was setting us up to start learning from Elisha in Chapter 3. When we meet Elisha in 1Kings 19, he's busy plowing his field, doing his work when Elijah comes along, puts the cloak of his calling on Elisha's shoulders and invites him into the greatest adventure of his life. Elisha was not doing anything cool or exciting. He was doing the same work that he did everyday. And Pastor Furtick says:
Doing the same stuff over and over again is a good thing in many instances. Routine is a vital and biblical component of our relationship with God. It's also the key to maintaining a marriage, holding down a job, staying in shape, and achieving many other desirable goals. That's not the kind of repetition we need to be rescued from - it's the kind of discipline we should embrace.
Lightbulbs and fireworks!! Discipline! Obedience is the attitude of the heart that is the consistent with God's character, but discipline is the action that makes it happen. I've been frustrated by my inability to be obedient when it's really discipline that I am missing. Proverbs has a lot to say about discipline.
The evil deeds of a wicked man ensnare him, the cords of his sin hold him fast. He will die for lack of discipline, led astray by his own great folly. Prov. 5:22-23 (NIV)
God has put me in a position to do great things. I have been able to use my weight loss journey to inspire and minister to others. At work, I'm an example of how you can get ahead using Biblical principles of leadership, without clawing and back-stabbing and stepping on people. But if I lack discipline, my accomplishments will die. My witness will die. My dreams will die.
What if Elisha had not been disciplined? What if he had been off surfing the internet, or making his second Starbucks run of the day when Elijah came looking for him? He may have missed out on his calling. Discipline puts me in the place I need to be to hear from God.
But HOW?? How do I live a disciplined life? Well, Paul has the answer to that one.
For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do - this I keep on doing...What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God - through Jesus Christ our Lord! Rom. 7:19, 24-25 (NIV)
Through Jesus. Jesus in Me. That's the only way that I'll step away from the M&M jar and knock things off my to-do list and be obedient to what He's called me to do. Being disciplined is Greater living for me. I find it funny that in a book all about breaking out of the routine and living a Greater life, the lesson I learned is about being disciplined and staying in my routine. God just cracks me up sometimes!
